If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

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Ampoliros
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If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby Ampoliros » 23 Apr 2009 19:53

Lets look at what they think of KJA's new books!

Terra Incognita:
Having wound up his seven-volume space opera, the Saga of Seven Suns, bestseller Anderson moves hesitantly into fantasy with this uninspired series opener. A promising attempt to end a long history of war between the followers of Aiden and Urec, two of the sons of creator-god Ondun, is scuttled when an accidental fire engulfs the city of Ishalem, which occupies the isthmus separating the warring kingdoms. The repercussions of the blaze, which include massacres, betrayals and vicious reprisals, play out over the next 13 years as naval chartsmen guide the kingdoms' sailing ships through the treacherous waters around Ishalem. The details of the cultures and politics add little insight into human nature, and a paucity of fantasy elements gives readers no reason to prefer this tale over its numerous contemporaries. (June)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

They forgot to mention that the CD (what's been released of it) sucks too.

Enemies and Allies:

Anderson's latest is a hokey, contrived imagining of the first meeting between Batman and Superman, set during the thick of the cold war and hobbled by flat characters and flatter dialogue ("My source was murdered shortly after she spoke with me. That tells me that Luthor must not have wanted her talking"). The two superheroes are initially introduced when Clark Kent interviews Bruce Wayne for a feature in the Daily Planet, and their alter egos cross paths again as Batman and Superman are drawn into Lex Luthor's dastardly scheme for world domination. (It involves the Soviets and "Death-ray transmitters.") To stop it, Batman and Superman embark on a ludicrous globe-trotting mission that's equal parts camp and Forrest Gump. A schlocky mediocrity for die-hard fans only. (May)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.



Awww. At least they liked Paul of Dune...
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SandChigger
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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby SandChigger » 23 Apr 2009 23:15

Nice! Better make sure these are reposted on the appropriate pages on Amazon. :twisted:

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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby GamePlayer » 23 Apr 2009 23:25

The most enjoyable part of any reading in which KJA is somehow involved.
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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby TheDukester » 24 Apr 2009 16:13

Ampoliros wrote:Lets look at what they think of KJA's new books!

Fucking awesome! Good catch on those.

Seriously, stuff like this should always be posted here. We should never let a link go by.
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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby Hunchback Jack » 27 Apr 2009 16:09

Very nice. Both these reviews capture KJA's mediocrity nicely.

HBJ

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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby trang » 28 Apr 2009 05:41

He's writing fantasy now??? is nothing safe? tolkien rewrite in the future?

Good reviews on his terrible prose, thanks for sharing.
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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby SandChigger » 28 Apr 2009 09:54

When the hell has that hack NOT been writing fantasy? Was there ever any scientific basis for the Normacle?

He only thinks he writes science fiction. 'Cause it's cool. And trendy. With unlimited special effects! Wow. :roll:

Fucking pathetic hack tool. :crazy:
I have heard of only one mistake that doesn’t have an explanation for a careful reader...with an open mind. (And, no, I’m not going to tell you what it is!) —KJA

I don't like every writer's style; for instance, I have never been able to get through Ursula LeGuin, China Mieville, or Iain Banks, all of whom are critical darlings. —KJA

I...had written a bunch of Star Wars and X-Files books...that proved not just that I'm a hack, but that I could write in somebody else's universe... —KJA

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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby Ampoliros » 28 Apr 2009 13:33

and here I thought he was writing Young Adult fiction.
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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby SandChigger » 28 Apr 2009 22:16

What's the age range on YA?

What parent would WANT their children to read this shit?

Well ... there was one guy on Facebook the other day who posted that he was thinking of giving his 12- or 13-year-old daughter House Atreides to get her started on the series. :shock:

To me, that's tantamout to child abuse. Why not just wait another year or three and give her Dune? :roll:

Poor kids... :(
I have heard of only one mistake that doesn’t have an explanation for a careful reader...with an open mind. (And, no, I’m not going to tell you what it is!) —KJA

I don't like every writer's style; for instance, I have never been able to get through Ursula LeGuin, China Mieville, or Iain Banks, all of whom are critical darlings. —KJA

I...had written a bunch of Star Wars and X-Files books...that proved not just that I'm a hack, but that I could write in somebody else's universe... —KJA

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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby Robspierre » 29 Apr 2009 02:00

Ampoliros wrote:and here I thought he was writing Young Adult fiction.


Most YA is better written than the shit KJA spews. He writes for stunted shitheads who live in basements and jerk off to pics of their sister in bathing suits.

Rob

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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby SandChigger » 29 Apr 2009 03:43

Now wasn't THAT a pretty mental picture. :shock:
I have heard of only one mistake that doesn’t have an explanation for a careful reader...with an open mind. (And, no, I’m not going to tell you what it is!) —KJA

I don't like every writer's style; for instance, I have never been able to get through Ursula LeGuin, China Mieville, or Iain Banks, all of whom are critical darlings. —KJA

I...had written a bunch of Star Wars and X-Files books...that proved not just that I'm a hack, but that I could write in somebody else's universe... —KJA

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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby Tleszer » 29 Apr 2009 07:58

Rob, there was not one single thing wrong with that post. :D
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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby Ampoliros » 29 Apr 2009 09:00

Robspierre wrote:
Ampoliros wrote:and here I thought he was writing Young Adult fiction.


Most YA is better written than the shit KJA spews. He writes for stunted shitheads who live in basements and jerk off to pics of their sister in bathing suits.

Rob


Hey some people have hot sisters! And are so lonely...
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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby GamePlayer » 29 Apr 2009 11:09

This discussion certainly turned creepy :shock:
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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby TheDukester » 29 Apr 2009 11:43

Nah, I used to do that all the time. Plus, my sisters are hot.

Wait ... is that too much?
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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby Freakzilla » 29 Apr 2009 11:52

TheDukester wrote:Nah, I used to do that all the time. Plus, my sisters are hot.

Wait ... is that too much?


:banana-gotpics:
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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby Tleszer » 29 Apr 2009 12:07

Freakzilla wrote:
TheDukester wrote:Nah, I used to do that all the time. Plus, my sisters are hot.

Wait ... is that too much?


:banana-gotpics:

:text-worthless:
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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby GamePlayer » 29 Apr 2009 13:05

Okay, now the thread's gone creepy and disturbing :)
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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby Freakzilla » 29 Apr 2009 13:25

My wife has four sisters... :wink:
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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby SadisticCynic » 29 Apr 2009 13:30

Freakzilla wrote:My wife has four sisters... :wink:


:dance:
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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby Ampoliros » 29 Apr 2009 13:41

for the record, i have no sisters, and only 1 hot cousin. She;s the only female in my generation of both sides of my family.

also, for the record, I was joking. Mostly...
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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby Omphalos » 29 Apr 2009 17:36

TheDukester wrote:Nah, I used to do that all the time. Plus, my sisters are hot.

Wait ... is that too much?


Pics Dude! Pics. We need some new hot tookey around here now that Baraka's girlfriend's pic has disappared into the threads.

And.....you live in Reno, right? :think:

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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby Ampoliros » 29 Apr 2009 19:33

so...she's single then eh?
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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby Robspierre » 29 Apr 2009 22:35

Freakzilla wrote:My wife has four sisters... :wink:



:text-worthless:

Share you stingy bastard!
:ugeek:

Rob

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Re: If Publisher's Weekly is a major reviewer then...

Postby A Thing of Eternity » 30 Apr 2009 01:54

Baraka Bryan wrote:
Ampoliros wrote:so...she's single then eh?


lol... who knows for how long tho.. some dude in her program apparently stole her heart. after 2 years she just decided she didnt want what i had to offer anymore. whatever.


Rough deal, my condolences.
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