Great Stools of Dune predictions: here we go again!

[SandChigger]

Same deal as with "Heroes", only a little bit less structure & information to hang things on. I've gone ahead and set up a new page for collecting everything, though:

Predictions for the Great Schools Books

Brian mentioned these titles in an interview last August: The Sisterhood of Dune, The Mentats of Dune, The Swordmasters of Dune. They've also mouthfarted in the past about a Guild book and a book on the C.E.T. & OCB (see TheKJA's reply to Carlos yesterday), but those would probably be absorbed into the main three books, especially if Brian is serious about putting a cap on "major books" in the near future.

I've already put something under the C.E.T. heading, about that ole "neutral island".

[Harq al Ada]

I wish they would stop. really I do. if I believed it worked and I had a god/s to pray to I would pray for a plane to crash into BH and KJA as they were writing these books and cause them both to suffer some kind of dissociative fugue.

[TheDukester]

... those would probably be absorbed into the main three books, especially if Brian is serious about putting a cap on "major books" in the near future.

Not to mention that he turns 63 later this month. And that's a hard 63.

[Omphalos]

I had forgotten Bo-Bo was that old. Here's my prediction: Bo-Bo gets to take the great, dark nap, and in his will specifies that Spanks gets to finish all six of those books by himself.

Seriously, I think it'll actually be funny to see how they get from the magic, suicice bomber-witches to RMs. I foresee 35 chapters, each detailing the fatal effects of trying out different poisons. Boring!!!

[SandChigger]

I wish they would stop. really I do. if I believed it worked and I had a god/s to pray to I would pray for a plane to crash into BH and KJA as they were writing these books and cause them both to suffer some kind of dissociative fugue.

We prefer to pray for a meteor to smite KJA on his bald noggin. That way there can be no question of human agency and no possible way of implicating any of us if and when (Please, O Fictional God I Don't Believe In!) it happens.

Brian we just ignore because he's either permanently Out To Lunch or Evil Incarnate; either way, we can't really tell until KJA is out of the way.

[MrFlibble]

I wish they would stop. really I do.

On one hand, I find the prospect of moar new McDune books utterly disturbing. On the other, each new instalment just hammers down the fact that either they're completely incapable of understanding the original universe, or are deliberately ignoring it. In any case, this should cause aversion to the McDune franchise even in those who were initially tolerant towards it. And besides, it is my understanding that statistics show a steady decline in sales and popularity with every new book, so they're welcome to go ahead and write - how did KJA threaten 'Chig once? as long as there are new stories to tell?

[Sev]

Wasn't his threat something along the lines of "...we'll continue writing them until you actually like one of them"???

And what's with the "... of Dune"

[SandChigger]

It was something stupid like they would continue to write and write books until I was satisfied.

I was tickled that my opinion means so much to him!


(It's like Ritz crackers. Everything goes better with "of Dune" tacked on the end. Didn't you know that, Sev of Dune? )

[SandRider]

I think I already did "SandDunes of Dune" the last time we did this ...

[merkin muffley]

Wasn't his threat something along the lines of "...we'll continue writing them until you actually like one of them"???

Come on, at least TRY to look for an answer before railing about the books. Rest assured, though, that Brian and I will keep writing the novels, and keep writing them, for as long as it takes until you are completely satisfied. You give us the incentive to keep the series going for many years to come.

So your position really is that the entire narrative text of Dune and all of Frank’s books was also written by Irulan?

Simple question, simple answer: Yes or No.

...

Well, how 'bout it, Kevin!? Because that is the answer you find when you look in the stupid-ass book: the narrative of Dune was written by Irulan. It's right there, in the tepid, totally unconvincing dialogue. Nobody talks like that, unless they're talking to themselves, wearing a fanny pack.

EDIT:

[TheDukester]

Didn't DuneFish do a "Dune of DUNE" cover a while back?

My theory (repeated from the ChiggieBlog): that is when we know they have reached the end of their wholesale franchise-rape. After the "heroes," after the "great schools," after whatever else Spanky can talk Bobo into, they'll go out with the ultimate in Dune-ness:

Dune of DUNE

[Hunchback Jack]

Prediction: I think these three, if they eventuate, will be like the House books, in that the titles are meaningless. I think this will be a trilogy of medicore SF pap, in which the BG sisterhood, the Mentat school and the Swordmaster school get created from whole cloth, at the last minute, as an afterthought.

HBJ

[Thodol]

Prediction: The three Great Schools is going to be an Animal House style romp. With the Swordsmasters as the campus jocks who often raid the BG house (sorority) of panties (space panties) The mentats will be done in the style of Revenge of the Nerds. And how they overcome diversity and weekly beatings by the Swordmasters to eventually win the love of the BG.

These books will also be the introduction to the Young nu-Dune series. Whose target demographic will be school children. Vampires of Dune will be the next book.

[merkin muffley]

We will meet the eccentric recluse Lord Sandwich, who moved to an asteroid field called "The Hawaiian Islands," just before the nuclear holocaust. The C.E.T. convenes at his space resort "The Brown Repose."

[DuneFishUK]

We will meet the eccentric recluse Lord Sandwich, who moved to an asteroid field called "The Hawaiian Islands," just before the nuclear holocaust. The C.E.T. convenes at his space resort "The Brown Repose."

It's almost a dead cert that the 'island' is a space station.


...unless Norma can fix the Earth...

[Tleszer]

Prediction: The three Great Schools is going to be an Animal House style romp. With the Swordsmasters as the campus jocks who often raid the BG house (sorority) of panties (space panties) The mentats will be done in the style of Revenge of the Nerds. And how they overcome diversity and weekly beatings by the Swordmasters to eventually win the love of the BG.

These books will also be the introduction to the Young nu-Dune series. Whose target demographic will be school children. Vampires of Dune will be the next book.

Awesome. Just awesome.

[Superdog]

The titles to the House trilogy were meaningless, so these titles could be the same. Basically a sequel to Legends, which both attempted to and didn't really at all explain where all the great schools come from. And their desire to have them all tied to the same cast of characters was absurd. Abulurd Harkonnen is related to the first Emperor? In god's name why? And the proto-BG gave birth to the first Navigator right? So are they aware of that? Cuz remaking a Norma Cenva super being is probably a better deal than a Kwisatz Haderach. And how did they lose their ability to self destruct their minds?

And the swordsmasters already existed in the LoD series so I'm not sure what else needs to be written about them.

[SandChigger]

This afternoon I got a Facebook friend named Lauren to post this on the Official Dune page Wall:

Lauren: Quick question: Is the Heroes of Dune series being sidelined (or cancelled) in favor of the Schools series, presumably about the Bene Gesserit?
10 hours ago

Got this response:

Official Dune: Announcement coming soon!
about an hour ago

Why all the hush-hush cloak-and-dagger silliness?

Teg & I have talked on the phone Wednesday & Thursday evenings. I can't figure out why they just don't come out and announce it instead of pussy-footing around about it like this. He wonders if there isn't some fighting going on inside the HLP. Maybe Brian has grown a pair and is getting stroppy? They're going to look stupid however they play it, and this makes it that much more obvious that it's really the publishers calling the shots. (If that wasn't already clear enough from last year's title & cover changes.) Teg thinks that the fact Byron (usually the last to know shit about anything) is in the loop and on top of it (he was the first to drop a hint something was up, after all) indicates that there may actually be some kind of voting or decision process/discussion going on inside the HLP...

EXCITING TIMES, huh?

[Freakzilla]

Fun is guaranteed to be had by all!

[D Pope]

I view the possibility of dissention among the ranks of the HPL as a positive. However, my cynical side kicks in & doesn't allow any hope. I trust you guys'll add info as it becomes available?

[TheDukester]

I view the possibility of dissention among the ranks of the HPL as a positive.

Oh, it would very much be a positive. As would anything that threatens Keith's gigantic (yet amazingly fragile) ego. I see that as the only thing that could ever lead to The Journeyman deciding to break away from the Dune cash-and-fame cow.

I love this Trouble In Paradise theory; I think it's got some legs. We certainly saw some of it last summer — just read between the lines for TheKJA's blatant ridiculing of Bobo — and the best thing that could ever to the OH movement would be for that to be just the beginnings of some major cracks in the HLP foundation.

[merkin muffley]

Someone at HLP is probably worried that SandChigger is coming up with better ideas in the Predictions articles.

I love this Trouble In Paradise theory; I think it's got some legs. We certainly saw some of it last summer — just read between the lines for TheKJA's blatant ridiculing of Bobo

What do I search to find the examples of KJA's Bobo-ridiculing? I'm very interested in this.

[TheDukester]

It's from last summer's Jessica Has Wind on DUNE tour updates on Keith's blog. There's lots of little nuggets there — "Brian had a difficult day" is a personal favorite.

His main site is wordfire.com. You might have to poke around a bit to get to last summer's stuff. I'm leaving for a bike ride right now, and if you haven't found it by the time I get back, I'll investigate further.

[D Pope]

Not sure what he's refering to specifically, I was astounded by the KJH speaking to google.


More than once I felt like Brian could've backhanded him, instead he does this whipped dog, head down submission. I only made it through about ten minuites.

[merkin muffley]

ugh, so smarmy