God Help Me, I'm Going In

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    Abandon all sanity ye who enter here

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Freakzilla
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Postby Freakzilla » 08 Oct 2008 08:51

OMG :shock:
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Paul of Dune was so bad it gave me a seizure that dislocated both of my shoulders and prolapsed my anus.
~Pink Snowman

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Serkanner
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Postby Serkanner » 08 Oct 2008 08:55

I am relieved to read you have survived this ordeal ... and OMG :shock: is the only suitable response after reading your synopses. I will never ever read this crap!
"... the mystery of life isn't a problem to solve but a reality to experience."

“There is no escape—we pay for the violence of our ancestors.”

Sandrider: "Keith went to Bobo's for a weekend of drinking, watched some DVDs,
and wrote a Dune Novel."

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Freakzilla
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Postby Freakzilla » 08 Oct 2008 08:57

All I can say is Brittney has nice teeth.
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Paul of Dune was so bad it gave me a seizure that dislocated both of my shoulders and prolapsed my anus.
~Pink Snowman

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dunaddict
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Postby dunaddict » 08 Oct 2008 09:46

chanilover wrote:Scytale is now a good guy! I think this is the worst scene, it's is so infantile that you would laugh at it if you weren't so numb from the pages of shite which had preceded it


I agree. Soooo sweet it makes you sick:

Scytale had used the cells in his nullentropy capsule to regrow gholas of the last Tleilaxu Council, and now the little ones followed him everywhere, reminding her of a mother duck trailed by ducklings.

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Freakzilla
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Postby Freakzilla » 08 Oct 2008 10:07

:puke:
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Paul of Dune was so bad it gave me a seizure that dislocated both of my shoulders and prolapsed my anus.
~Pink Snowman

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DuneFishUK
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Postby DuneFishUK » 08 Oct 2008 13:27

Sounds er.. great :? :shock:

Sole Man

on SANDWORMS OF DUNE

Postby Sole Man » 08 Oct 2008 15:09

*Cradels CL's head*

You were an inocent mind.

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Freakzilla
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Postby Freakzilla » 08 Oct 2008 15:16

There are no innocents.
~Paul-Muad'dib
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Paul of Dune was so bad it gave me a seizure that dislocated both of my shoulders and prolapsed my anus.
~Pink Snowman

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Rakis
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Postby Rakis » 08 Oct 2008 22:54

dunaddict wrote:
chanilover wrote:Scytale is now a good guy! I think this is the worst scene, it's is so infantile that you would laugh at it if you weren't so numb from the pages of shite which had preceded it


I agree. Soooo sweet it makes you sick:

Scytale had used the cells in his nullentropy capsule to regrow gholas of the last Tleilaxu Council, and now the little ones followed him everywhere, reminding her of a mother duck trailed by ducklings.


Ditto...This is the Tlelaxu, not a fucking,low grade,Sesame Street puppet... :roll:
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Raveem
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Postby Raveem » 11 Oct 2008 05:58

I have to state that I have never read further than House Atreides and a few chapters in House Harkonnen. Even this much was enough to convert me to a lifelong hazard to BH, should he ever be in the vicinity.

The only brush I had with double dose of "Dune 7" BH/KJA style was when I was perusing the sandworm article on Wikipedia in order to see information collated in one place. This lead me to read the Leto II article and, like a train, I failed to see where the tracks terminated and ran on into the BH/KJA Leto II section! Like suddenly discovering that one's fruit smoothie had started siphoning raw sewage into the gullet, it was only by dint of sheer effort one didn't choke and die.

A few points which brought me close to death were:


- "Even at a very young age, Leto shows signs that he may be more than he seems. During an assassination attempt, he somehow transforms into a small sandworm and defends himself before reverting to an innocent one-year-old."

- "The largest of the seven sandworms, Monarch, allows Leto to jump down its gullet to bond with it."

- "All seven worms fuse together into one massive worm, and the God Emperor returns once again to a deep sleep within the planet's surface."


Words can't describe the fountain of shit that were the prequels, and it is probably beyond human experience to actualise a manifestation of negativity that does justice to the sequels.

The only possible explanation is that this is the most brilliant marketing campaign ever for original Dune (+ encyclopedia), combined with a tahaddi-challenge for Dune fans. Those that unthinkingly fall for the *quels are shown as the shallow mindless sligs that they are. Those that wade through the dung to find the pearls (and there is so much dung now, with promises of fresh deluges to come) are redeemed.

Additionally, it would have been impossible for me to appreciate further the pinnacles that are the originals, without their alter egos from the bowels of mediocrity that masquerade as Dune.

How else to explain these signal "achievements" without losing one's sense? [/i]

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SandChigger
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Postby SandChigger » 11 Oct 2008 19:07

There's a relevant quote from Laozi to throw in here, but I can't be bothered looking it up. ;)

I envy you your unsullied state. ;)


(Welcome aboard, too, by the way! Noticed you'd joined, was waiting to see if you'd do a "Happy to Meet Me!" thread. :D )
I have heard of only one mistake that doesn’t have an explanation for a careful reader...with an open mind. (And, no, I’m not going to tell you what it is!) —KJA

I don't like every writer's style; for instance, I have never been able to get through Ursula LeGuin, China Mieville, or Iain Banks, all of whom are critical darlings. —KJA

I...had written a bunch of Star Wars and X-Files books...that proved not just that I'm a hack, but that I could write in somebody else's universe... —KJA


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