Streets of Arrakeen - poem

    Post your own creative writing

Moderators: Omphalos, Freakzilla, ᴶᵛᵀᴬ

User avatar
Leto Atreides II
Posts: 34
Joined: 02 Feb 2010 17:36
Location: Arrakis

Streets of Arrakeen - poem

Postby Leto Atreides II » 10 Feb 2019 12:50

I recently published a book of poetry

Including this work, which I wrote in the spirit of a song, rather than a poem:

Smells of spice and sand
Crysknife near my hand
Stillsuit encompasses my form
Traversing the abode of the worm

The unwary are liable to get hurt
Like a little melon at the edge of the desert
Defenseless against rapacious slaughter
Batigh, I'll take your water

Strike before I'm seen
In the streets of Arrakeen

Born in the shadow of Shuloch
To a people of whom few talk
Raised on anger and hate
For fools for whom we lay in wait

Or hunt where they convene
In the streets of Arrakeen

Strike before I'm seen
In the streets of Arrakeen
Only fools prefer the past!

User avatar
Freakzilla
Lead Singer and Driver of the Winnebego
Posts: 18257
Joined: 05 Feb 2008 01:27
Location: Atlanta, Georgia, USA
Contact:

Re: Streets of Arrakeen - poem

Postby Freakzilla » 11 Feb 2019 08:05

:clap:
Image
Paul of Dune was so bad it gave me a seizure that dislocated both of my shoulders and prolapsed my anus.
~Pink Snowman

georgiedenbro
Posts: 853
Joined: 11 Jun 2014 13:56
Location: Montreal, Canada

Re: Streets of Arrakeen - poem

Postby georgiedenbro » 11 Feb 2019 12:05

The "I'll take your water" line is welcome here in Jacurutu sietch.
"um-m-m-ah-h-h-hm-m-m-m!"

User avatar
Serkanner
Administrator
Posts: 2871
Joined: 17 Feb 2008 18:44
Location: Den Haag - The Netherlands

Re: Streets of Arrakeen - poem

Postby Serkanner » 11 Feb 2019 13:50

Very nice! :clap:
"... the mystery of life isn't a problem to solve but a reality to experience."

“There is no escape—we pay for the violence of our ancestors.”

Sandrider: "Keith went to Bobo's for a weekend of drinking, watched some DVDs,
and wrote a Dune Novel."

User avatar
Naib
Posts: 339
Joined: 30 Jan 2014 15:54

Re: Streets of Arrakeen - poem

Postby Naib » 13 Feb 2019 11:02

:clap:
We need more like this.

User avatar
Freakzilla
Lead Singer and Driver of the Winnebego
Posts: 18257
Joined: 05 Feb 2008 01:27
Location: Atlanta, Georgia, USA
Contact:

Re: Streets of Arrakeen - poem

Postby Freakzilla » 18 Mar 2019 10:51

I deleted the link to Amazon, posting your poetry here is cool, selling it is not.

The Rules
Image
Paul of Dune was so bad it gave me a seizure that dislocated both of my shoulders and prolapsed my anus.
~Pink Snowman

User avatar
Omphalos
Inglorious Bastard
Posts: 6677
Joined: 05 Feb 2008 11:07
Location: The Mighty Central Valley of California
Contact:

Re: Streets of Arrakeen - poem

Postby Omphalos » 18 Mar 2019 18:57

:shock: shit! Forgot we had any rules!

User avatar
Freakzilla
Lead Singer and Driver of the Winnebego
Posts: 18257
Joined: 05 Feb 2008 01:27
Location: Atlanta, Georgia, USA
Contact:

Re: Streets of Arrakeen - poem

Postby Freakzilla » 19 Mar 2019 09:14

Omphalos wrote::shock: shit! Forgot we had any rules!


(Someone reminded me of them in a PM) :lol:
Image
Paul of Dune was so bad it gave me a seizure that dislocated both of my shoulders and prolapsed my anus.
~Pink Snowman

User avatar
chanilover
Posts: 1644
Joined: 18 Feb 2008 08:29

Re: Streets of Arrakeen - poem

Postby chanilover » 21 Mar 2019 16:04

That was cool. Has Nebiros published anything recently?
"You and your buddies and that b*tch Mandy are nothing but a gang of lying, socially maladjusted losers." - St Hypatia of Arrakeen.
Image
Image

User avatar
Freakzilla
Lead Singer and Driver of the Winnebego
Posts: 18257
Joined: 05 Feb 2008 01:27
Location: Atlanta, Georgia, USA
Contact:

Re: Streets of Arrakeen - poem

Postby Freakzilla » 22 Mar 2019 16:58

chanilover wrote:That was cool. Has Nebiros published anything recently?


LOL, I don't follow him.
Image
Paul of Dune was so bad it gave me a seizure that dislocated both of my shoulders and prolapsed my anus.
~Pink Snowman

User avatar
Omphalos
Inglorious Bastard
Posts: 6677
Joined: 05 Feb 2008 11:07
Location: The Mighty Central Valley of California
Contact:

Re: Streets of Arrakeen - poem

Postby Omphalos » 25 Mar 2019 10:46

chanilover wrote:That was cool. Has Nebiros published anything recently?


I really miss his cluelessness. He was sweet.

User avatar
Leto Atreides II
Posts: 34
Joined: 02 Feb 2010 17:36
Location: Arrakis

Re: Streets of Arrakeen - poem

Postby Leto Atreides II » 04 Apr 2019 15:19

Freakzilla wrote:I deleted the link to Amazon, posting your poetry here is cool, selling it is not.

OK, sorry about that.

Thanks for all the positive feedback, folks! :D
Only fools prefer the past!