Metaphors for New Dune!

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Nekhrun
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Metaphors for New Dune!

Postby Nekhrun » 10 Jun 2008 13:26

We've now got a metaphor saying that New Dune is the McDonald's of Science Fiction, but it would be nice to add to the list. Especially since there are those out there who don't know what a metaphor is, mixed or otherwise.

I'll start:

New Dune is George Bush trying to convince future historians that he really wasn't that bad.

New Dune is a smelly pile of shit on a rack of ribs.

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Phaedrus
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Postby Phaedrus » 10 Jun 2008 14:47

Are similes allowed, or do they need a thread to themselves?
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Nekhrun
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Postby Nekhrun » 10 Jun 2008 14:53

Phaedrus wrote:Are similes allowed, or do they need a thread to themselves?

I'll go start another thread for that. :D

Edit: Here you go!

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Postby Phaedrus » 10 Jun 2008 15:33

Telling a friend to read New Dune is pissing in a bottle and telling him to drink it.
You aren't thinking or really existing unless you're willing to risk even your own sanity in the judgment of your existence.

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Postby Serkanner » 10 Jun 2008 15:38

The new dune is for a reader what Oranjeboom is for a beer drinker: urine!

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Nekhrun
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Postby Nekhrun » 10 Jun 2008 15:44

Serkanner wrote:The new dune is for a reader what Oranjeboom is for a beer drinker: urine!

Analogy! Get back in your thread! :D

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orald
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Postby orald » 10 Jun 2008 15:49

New Dune getting "best-seller" status is Bill Clinton&Co. winning the Nobel Peace Prize.
In memory of Perach, who suffered and died needlessly.

I wish I could have been with you that one last time.

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Serkanner
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Postby Serkanner » 10 Jun 2008 16:55

Nekhrun wrote:
Serkanner wrote:The new dune is for a reader what Oranjeboom is for a beer drinker: urine!

Analogy! Get back in your thread! :D


Blast! I knew I got them mixed up again.

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Postby drunken_scot » 20 Jun 2008 20:59

Things were wonderful once. There was that magnificent restaurant Chez Herbert,[i] with the head chef [i]Franc. The food there was delicious, but most famed were the delicious D'une dishes. There were six of them. There were delicious, filling, and nutritious. Alas, the D'une recipes were somewhat the victims of their own success, being so desirable that they became addictive. The name D'une became a killing word, destroying the sanity of those who were addicted. Addicts ached for more D'une dishes, even those made by his son and a short-order chef. The new chefs, though, had no grasp of the subtle mélange that Franc had seasoned his dishes with, opting instead for SPICE (and even ULTRASPICE). The drug pushers remain, refusing to serve the old dishes as they were (the recipes, fortunately, are still available,) and insist on replacing old flavors with completely inappropriate ones. Having finished completing the incomplete recipes that Franc had left, unsavory as the results were, they are now focusing on serving larger glasses of Coca-cola to have between courses: destructive, empty calories that have nothing at all to do with good food, but popular with people who don't know better.

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Postby chanilover » 23 Jun 2008 03:45

^^^
Hi, welcome to the forum.
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Postby trang » 23 Jun 2008 07:40

reading new dune is that feeling you get when ya have to go number two and your running(bowlegged funny walk) and ya just dont quite make it!

Trang
"Long Live the Fighters", "Dragon.....the other white meat."

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Postby SandChigger » 23 Jun 2008 18:37

New Dune is being in the sitch Trang described ^^^, finally getting to plop it down on the pot and explosively emptying your bowels of what remains—the most noxious and vile movement of your life—and ONLY THEN looking over and noticing there's no paper.


(If that doesn't jumpstart Spicelon...he's dead. :lol: )
"Let the dead give water to the dead. As for me, it's NO MORE FUCKING TEARS!"

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Postby orald » 24 Jun 2008 09:41

Reading New Dung is like finding out you've got a nice sum in a deposit program(w/e) in the bank and then realizing it only bloody comes out in 2045(!!) when you're bloody 60 because some politician shmuck decided it's good for the economy that everyone will die before they can get their money out.

No, wait, I'm just pissed. At least I've got one coming out *only* in 2017. *joy :| *
In memory of Perach, who suffered and died needlessly.



I wish I could have been with you that one last time.

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Nekhrun
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Postby Nekhrun » 24 Jun 2008 10:35

Looks like I'll have to be the metaphor police around here. I should've just combined the metaphors, similes and analogies into one thread. :wink:

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Freakzilla
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Postby Freakzilla » 24 Jun 2008 10:43

Nekhrun wrote:Looks like I'll have to be the metaphor police around here. I should've just combined the metaphors, similes and analogies into one thread. :wink:


I can do that, if you'd like...
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Nekhrun
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Postby Nekhrun » 24 Jun 2008 12:19

That's fine with me, whatever you think is best. It might get people moving a little if they don't have to think about if what they're saying is a metaphor, analogy, or simile.

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Freakzilla
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Postby Freakzilla » 24 Jun 2008 12:24

Well, I thought I could. I can't figure it out right now, I'm at work... maybe one of the other admins/mods knows how?
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Paul of Dune was so bad it gave me a seizure that dislocated both of my shoulders and prolapsed my anus.
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orald
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Postby orald » 24 Jun 2008 13:31

Ooh, ooh, I know! Let me into the admin CP and I'll fix everything up!
Edric's account might accidentally be lost in the process and his whole IP region banned.
In memory of Perach, who suffered and died needlessly.



I wish I could have been with you that one last time.